Was that a confession, Light?
by Magnificent Aurora
Summary: What if a confession out of Light wasn't what L had truly wanted? A discussion takes place between L and Light.


_This is pretty much what happens when I start practicing characterization; the whole thing turns into three pages long, and I feel the need to show it to the world. I would like to say that this fanfic is a dialogue between Light and L about the extents of Light's confession to being Kira. You should also notice that there is no narration, as I do not intend to master that part of writing, but I do enjoy writing raw dialogue._

...

"Ouch. Light-kun, you know, the more you hit me like this, the more it is likely for you to be Kira."

"You deserve it, Ryuzaki. You're a bastard."

"I wonder what have I done to earn such insult from Light-kun himself.."

"You constantly teasing me of being Kira and stopping at nothing to prove your claims right."

"But I am right, Light-kun. I can't help it if everything about you hints to Kira; your actions, your glares, your conceit, your smugness, your brilliance. Everything you do seems calculated to me. Anyone would say that a person with an intelligent mind is more likely to do that, which I do not deny for I am associated with the same behavior, however, your actions are a little too calculated, as if you're hiding a disastrous plan of yours that will explode at any second. You can fool anyone but me, Light, because I know for a fact that.."

"That I'm Kira."

"Yes."

"I can't take this anymore, Ryuzaki.."

"Is Kira-kun worried because he knows I know about his secret? Here, have some cooki-"

"Yes."

"Come again?"

"I am worried because I have no idea how this is going to turn out eventually."

[brief silence]

"Obviously, if you do admit to being Kira, I will have no option but to turn you in."

"I don't think you'd be capable of doing that, Ryuzaki. You know you won't be able to find someone that understands you on so many levels better than I do, or someone you would actually enjoy spending time with. I'm not saying that you necessarily need me, I'm just saying that you won't be as happy without me."

"Even so, the lives of the people involved are much more important than my personal happiness."

"You wouldn't deny them of the selfish and uncaring treatment you have always had towards everyone else, as long as it guarantees your own benefit."

"This case is different. The damage that Kira has made is more enormous than I would have ever imagined. It wouldn't be equally easy for me to step over all these people just in order to find me a worthy chess opponent."

"But I know that your ego and your selfishness could be equally enormous if the deal greatly concerns you. What I'm saying, Ryuzaki, is that even though it is likely you'll listen to your moral side and satisfy the general public because you feel that it is your duty to do so, it wouldn't be surprising to me or to anyone that actually knows you if you choose to ignore the seriousness of the situation and look where your happiness lies, because it is within your capacity to do this as well, for it is a big part of your personality, and I say this because I've spent enough time with you to know you more than anyone else does."

"Even so, the probability of me choosing the former option is still present, which would be a great risk to you if you do admit to being Kira. So I'm saying that it wouldn't be as reassuring as you think it would be to think that I would forgive you for your guilt."

"That is true, Ryuzaki, which is the reason why I refuse to admit in the first place."

"Are you confessing, Light-kun?"

"I'm not Ki-"

"Perhaps you need a motivator. I should ask Watari to provide you with the injection necessary to make you admit the truth despite your own will while defying your consciousness. However, if you were to confess, I would prefer if you do it while fully aware of your actions. I do not need a confession out of you, regardless. We both know I only taunt you because I enjoy doing that to you, but I assure you that I will obtain the truth of your guilt myself and without you having to confess to me as if I can't figure it out on my own, because we both know I can, and I already have."

"So you're saying, it actually bothers you if the truth were imposed on you because you won't be the one to discover it yourself?"

"Yes. It is a sense of competition, I suppose, but-"

"Then what if I told you that I'm Kira?"

"This act is too cheesy to be taken into consideration, Light-kun. I don't even have to point to the fact that you are only saying this because I have just told you that it would bother me if you do so, therefore your intention is to bother me."

"But it was you who said that you believe yourself right of your accusation of me being Kira, so hearing this right now won't adjust anything to your mindset, as you are already certain of your convictions."

"Yes. And regardless of you agreeing to my accusation and admitting that you're Kira, I am still determined to convict you by myself, without any confession from your side."

"But wouldn't it make your job much more easy if I were to admit guilt at last?"

"It would, but it wouldn't be right. This is my challenge and I will go through it the way I see fit, and I certainly wouldn't regard it as challenge if you were to ruin everything by turning yourself in and finishing the battle by taking all the fun from it and pretty much break the concept of challenge."

"Yes, but that would only apply to YOUR side, Ryuzaki. It would be a win over you if I were to deprive you from the challenge and the desire to prove yourself superior. You said it yourself; it wouldn't be YOU who convicted me, it would be I who convicted myself. Therefore it wouldn't be right to say that you'd win the battle, whilst I, being the one who did this to you, would be the winner."

"That would depend on how you view your supposed gain, Light-kun. You win over me, therefore you guarantee your pride ahead of mine, but you lose your life. I know it like I know my name that you value your life over everything else, including your pride. This attachment alone is what's keeping you from confessing and winning the battle. Your life is more precious to you than anything else and we both know it."

"Then I guess that leaves us in a paradox, does it not? I will refuse to admit because it will cost me my life, but that would mean you will still be able to pursue the challenge. However, you won't be able to find anything against me, which would leave you to the only option available which is resorting to a confession from me, but that would make you lose the deeper challenge as of which you regard this whole case."

"But why are you so certain that I will not be able to convict you myself, Light? If I were not capable of doing this in the first place, it wouldn't have been a challenge to both of us."

"I know, but it is only characteristic of me to be sure of my soon-to-be victory, as you are sure of yours."

"That is true, but I consider myself already half-winner of this battle for I am certain of you being Kira, therefore I was able to figure out who Kira is by myself."

"Even so, that would be a thing that only you and I could attest to. You could only prove your victory to the world by gaining full proof of my guilt."

"That is true, that small victory is nothing compared to the one that will bring utter embarrassment on your side when I finally expose who you truly are, which is why I am keen on convicting you the way it should be. However, there is one thing you should know about, Light-kun. I have credentials and people to back me up on everything I say, which means, even if I turn you in with absolutely no proof to attest to my claims, they would still accept my judgment and take my word on everything I say."

"But you wouldn't do that because you want to serve fair justice on me, and not false one."

"It's not about being fair, Light-kun. You should be the first one to know that I never play my cards fair, or else I wouldn't have already reached this progress. It's about releasing my full potential to win over this case and using all the intelligence I have and all the hard work I've put, instead of bringing you in merely because you deserve it."

"So I've been right. It's not a sense of justice to you, you don't care if I'm truly guilty of killing thousands of people, you only care about proving that to the world for it to know what you're capable of, and more importantly, to make Kira know what you're capable of, by winning this battle against him."

"I see no reason why you would talk about yourself using the third person, as we both know Kira is in fact you, Light-kun. Besides, I won't argue with you on my primary motives, but it would be an understatement to say that I don't care at all for the common good, because such cold-blooded murderer is capable of making the hearts of even the most uncaring persons tremble. I am not saying that I fear Kira, because you know that I don't, I'm just saying that he's making me feel a bit more pitiful for people who are in constant suffer from his actions to a greater degree than initially expected."

"So I guess it would be a boost to my ego to make someone like you actually feel pitiful for once in their life?"

"It depends on how you perceive it. Nonetheless, I feel entitled to prove you guilty by righteous means, and I will not allow anything to take that from me, not falsifying proof, and certainly not a confession out of you."

"I should have known that anyway. You are too intelligent and too proud to allow yourself to do what oppressive judicial systems do. You never conduct any actions without being one hundred percent sure of their righteousness. However, that stubbornness of yours could work against you at times, you know."

"It would be still better and much more forgivable than Kira's supposed judicial system. Don't you agree?"

"I do not wish to go through that conversation with you, Ryuzaki."

"Is it because it would ultimately lead to not-so-secretive confession out of you? Or is it because you know it would be pointless to change my point of view towards the matter?"

"I pick the latter. Plus I want to prevent any further physical damage."

"I understand. But I think such heated and intense debate would be worth it, don't you think?"

"Certainly not worth my life and your sanity though, for I would be convicted and you would be a loser, if I were Kira, that is."

"That is true, Light-kun. Although it is irritating how you're still capable of going this far with your denial while you've already hinted to your guilt on more than one occasion, that and the fact that I already know of your guilt."

"What difference would it make? You're still certain of your accusation and nothing I say will ever change your mind, even if I agree to your claims."

"I guess you're right. Besides, it would be a huge risk to take for someone who values their life so greatly like you do."

[brief silence]

"I'm going to get some strawberry sundae. What flavor would you prefer, Light-kun?"

"You surprise me sometimes, Ryuzaki. I thought you were so intent on proving your claims right to me. You could be jumpy, you know."

"The conversation was getting back to square one and I couldn't ignore this grumbling in my stomach any longer, or else I would have loved to keep debating with Kira-kun, but alas, I'm afraid I will need more sweets in order to stabilize the full functionality of my brain."

"As it would appear.."

...

_Sorry if that got cut off so abruptly, it was turning out to be directionless. When you try to do your best with characterization, you start to feel that things aren't up to you anymore and that the characters are in control of saying whatever they see fit.. o_o I know it's stupid, but a fellow writer understands the feeling. No offense to non-writers, as I'm not that big of a writer myself._

_PLEASE DO REVIEW for characterization and grammar. Conversations like this are so fun, seriously. It's like a drug but one that's actually beneficial. People should try writing dialogue once in a while, being able to direct it in any way you like is better than going through an actual dialogue. Meh._


End file.
